... but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear' Ambrose Redmoon
It needs to be understood that when someone intends to drastically change their life, there is necessarily some trepidation there.I remember when I was 15 and working part time for my mother's company. One of her colleagues was taking a new job and was afraid that this might not be the right path. At that point in my life, I was under the impression that all adults had everything together and always knew the answer to any question that you might put to them. My mother told me later that she had told him that a little fear is always necessary when you are changing your life. A lot of fear may be pushing you in another direction, but it is perfectly natural to fear change. It is our responsibility to accept that fear and make the change anyway, hoping that it'll all turn out for the best in the end.
Yesterday when I told my mum that I was writing this blog she made an analogy for losing weight that related to my comment about smoking earlier. Whilst obesity and smoking are often seen as comparable to each other in damage to people's health, it is entirely possible for a smoker to give up smoking. Food is fuel. Expecting a person to lose weight is like telling a smoker that they don't have to give up entirely, only cut down to 5 a day for the rest of their life. If smokers were given that choice, I think it would be entirely more difficult for them to quit. It is with that trepidation that many overweight people enter into a path of losing weight. Food is ALWAYS going to be there and there will always be the risk that bad habits will creep in when you've had a bad day, or simply want a break from the exhaustion that is holding back what seems so natural to you. This is why it is so very important to go into a weight loss program with a positive mental attitude. If you go in hating yourself and feeling like you're unworthy of something greater you are doomed to fail.
A few years back I went along to a LighterLife meeting. The whole premise seemed completely alien to me as the program relies entirely on replacing food with pre-portioned soups and milkshakes. My goal is to be a NORMAL person and it is my understanding that most normal people eat real food. This to me was conditioning people to struggle after they'd got to their goal weight as the transition back to food would be so difficult to maintain. At this meeting, when I discussed my concerns with the councillor I was informed that I couldn't possibly be happy the way I was and that the only way I would be happy is to lose weight. This infuriated me because it is this negative attitude that makes countless overweight people feel like they have no worth. How can a thing with no worth possibly hope to make change for the better? I told the gentleman to stuff it and not impose his own self loathing on to me, what he felt as an overweight person does not and should not define how all overweight people are meant to feel.
This is not the be all and end all of my life. And whilst I have some fear that I will make the same mistakes all over again, I can not allow that to hold me back. My mum once described long term maintained weight loss as a miracle because it is so very difficult. I am afraid of failing but that should never be reason enough to not try and this applies to anything that is important to you. So, tonight I will walk in to the Weight Watchers meeting I have located near me, worry that everyone is judging me; realise I'm being ridiculous and get on that scale. And then I will try. Because that is all anyone can ever do.
Finally, to all of the people who have tried and failed and fear that failure another time, remember:
"When life tells you to give up, hope whispers 'try it one more time' "
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